It was seven years ago today that we sprinkled my Daddy's ashes in Lake Maurepas {one of his favorite places}. He loved living on the river and being on his boat. Unfortuately, living on the river has a price, as you become one with the bad habits of living a life of leisure, which includes smoking, drinking and partying in excess. After years of living this way, it finally caught up with him at the very young age of 65. Cancer found it's way into his body and soul, leaving him a frail and painful existence. In his last days he lay in a hospital bed, pumped up with morphine and listening to "Pink Floyd". I brought all of his Pink Floyd cd's to the hospital and played them on his walkman until he crossed over to the "dark side of the moon". It seemed to calm him. He took his last breath to "comfortably numb", as my Sister and I stood at his beside and breathed a sigh of relif through a flood of tears. Not a day goes by that I don't think about him and wish he were here. I'm sharing this picture of him with you, just so you can see what I'm missing:
He and my Mother divorced when I was 18. She held a lot of bad feelings towards him and would always like to voice her feelings when I spoke lovingly and highly of him and she would always talk about how he "abandoned" us. Maybe he abandoned her, but he didn't abandon me. She would get upset because he would never hide his partying ways from us and we got to see him how he really was. Finally one day I pointed it out to her that she was the one that "picked" him, not me. It wasn't my fault that he was my Father, she had a choice, I did not. After I told her that, she never said anything bad about him {at least in front of me} ever again. Sure he had plently of "faults", but the good things he had outweighed them by far. He was the most kind, gentle and loving person I have ever known and I miss him more than anybody I probably ever will. So to him I say "Shine on you crazy diamond". He made me what I am today ~ a caring, artistic and loving person, and for that, I'm forever grateful.
And so today I'm wishing all those Daddys out there that have little girls that will always love them, no matter what, a Happy Father's Day!
"If one life shines, the life next to it will catch the light" ~ unknown
♥ xxoo & peace ~ Kathy
what a lovely commentary about your father - and thanks for sharing his picture! He looks like he was lots of fun to be around. I just had lunch w/ my dad - what a blessing it is to still have him here w/ me.
ReplyDeleteTreasure it, Kaye :0)
ReplyDeletegreat photo of your dad!
ReplyDeleteFather's Day was bittersweet yesterday because it was on my mom's b'day. She died a little over 3 years ago-cancer related.
While I was talking to my dad yesterday, I brought her up, and the conversation ended. We were both too choked up to say any more.
On a happier note- my dad is living with a woman (his age). They're in their 80's. This, after giving me carp about living with someone and not being married back in the day. Oh, how life comes full circle.....
Awe ~ that's sweet, Katie. And then they always like to say "do as I say, not as I do". :0)
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